We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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