I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
