I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
