when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
