she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
