I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
