it wasn't lemon gatorade
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
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