Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Two words: blizzard sex
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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