I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
