Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
