Sry I called you an 8
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
