I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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