hotel room ftw
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
