I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
