That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
