She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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