dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
