ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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