I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
