Just fell off a train. Bad.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize