If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
