I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
