talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
