Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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