it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
