It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
