Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize