Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
