WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize