Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
