If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize