I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
