you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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