Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Drake has all the answers
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
