I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
