that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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