okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
