You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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