HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
