We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
