so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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