U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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