it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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