dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
