At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize