can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize