Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
