I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
