Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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