I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
i now understand why vodka
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
