Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize